Today is a big day for me. Maybe this day isn't a huge deal to most moms, but it is for me. In just a little bit, I have to go register the girls for preschool.
I know, some of you are wondering what the big deal is. The big deal is that in the fall, my only two children will simultaneously leave for several hours, two days a week, to attend preschool. And we all know what that prefix "pre-" means, right? It means before. As in before school. As in the year before they simultaneously leave for several hours a day, five days a week, for the next 12 years! I can't even talk about what happens after that!
Don't get me wrong, I'm really excited about preschool. I'm excited about everything they'll be learning, the new friends they will make, and how much they will grow.
And I won't lie. I'm also a little excited about the prospect of a Tuesday morning Walmart run, with no one fighting over who gets to push the cart.
But mixed in with my excitement is a little bit of sadness and anxiety.
Should we split them up or leave them in the same class? Will they know as much as the other kids in their class? Have I taught them enough at home? Will they listen to their teacher? Will they remember to wash their hands after going to the bathroom?? Will they cry when I leave them? Will they cry when I pick them up?? What if I've picked the wrong preschool?
I could go on, but I won't.
Instead, I'm going to give myself a quick pep-talk and head out the door before it's too late.
Today, I will not give the preschool's assistant director another reason to doubt my emotional stability. I'm pretty sure she's already questioning it. The first time I spoke with her on the phone, my voice trembled several times. Then, during our tour of the school, my eyes filled with tears more than once.
Today, I'll do better.
I will not cry...I will not cry...I will not cry.
I'll let you know if I cried!